I definitely cannot speak for everyone about long-distance sex or when I talk about the luxury of living close to a romantic partner. The uncommon but ever desired ability to see a loved one whenever I choose, and in partnership with the ability to get down to business with my partner when we’re together, is a privilege that is not lost on me. A few of my closest friends have to deal with long-distance relationships, or the arguably more painful not-enough-time-in-the-day-to-see-you relationships. After a lengthy conversation with these close friends about what they can do to keep their… uh… you-know-whats you-know whatting while their partners aren’t right there next to them, I decided to share my insight into a few products that I have come across during my time as an adult store frequenter & employee, to try and help make the world a sexier place.
Part One: Toys For You
If you’re reading this article, there’s a good chance you already own a sex toy of some kind. Whether it be ye ol’ faithful vibrator, a classic fleshlight, or something on the premium side like a Womanizer or a Svakom Alex Thrusting Masturbator, you get the general gist of these sorts of things. They’re good for your you time. And although this isn’t necessarily the most revolutionary of ideas, it’s not too difficult to turn that you time into you two time. Share in each other’s pleasure, and make sure you’re both enjoying yourselves with the best toys available. For example:
For Vagina-Havers:
Womanizer Brand Products
The aforementioned Womanizer is at the forefront of changing the sex toy game. Stepping away from the traditional vibrators and dongs of years past, the Womanizer utilises gentle suction on the clitoris to provide a sensual blend of faux vibration, suction in all the right places, and precision that leaves nothing to be desired, hitting the spot every time. There’s a reason the Womanizer Duo has earned the moniker of “The Squirting Machine” .
Fun Factory Stronic Line
I remember first interacting with the stronic line from Fun Factory, and completely entranced by its seemingly supernatural back and forth thrusting action. For those unaware, the Stronic line from is an automatic thrusting toy that, well, thrusts itself. The stronic promises ‘hands-free fun’, and if that alone isn’t enticing, the ‘Stronic Real’ looks just like the real deal, all the while still being made from the Fun Factory famous surgical grade silicone. What’s not to love?
For Penis-Havers:
Svakom Alex Thrusting Masturbator
The Svakom Alex was pretty well summarised in an earlier article, but this product is so incredible, it needs to be discussed more than once. The Alex, as it will be called henceforth, is the penis-havers equivalent of the Stronic line from Fun Factory. The ability to go completely hands-free like an early 2000’s earpiece that every lucrative businessman had is a luxury few have experienced, and luxury it indeed is. The Alex is built with the best of fantasies in mind, with the stroking of the toy matched to an array of in-built sounds of fantasies for your enjoyment, or you can choose your speed to match your partner’s pleasure.
Fleshlight Brand Products
When it comes to Fleshlights, I always need to remind people that pleasuring yourself shouldn’t be frowned upon. Fleshlights have oft copped flak from the general public because of their perceived crudeness, but those people have clearly never actually tried a fleshlight! They’re the perfect tool to use over the phone with a lover on the other end. Fits in one hand, easy to clean, no electronics. Simple, sexy, sorted.
Part Two: Toys For Us
Before I go any further, it’s not US as in YOU and ME, it’s US as in YOU and YOUR PARTNER. Unless I am your partner. In which case, hi honey! Anyway, these are toys for you and your partner to experience together. These will be your remote-controlled/app-controlled/telepathically-controlled sorts of devices. For these sorts of toys, We-Vibe is leading the charge and innovating with some incredible new ideas and concepts that both you and your partner can enjoy. You may even be able to share a moment and learn how to find a porn star you like.
For Vagina-Havers:
We-Vibe Moxie
Now, it might be the fact that the poster for this product is staring me in the face as I write this, or the little things that make this an impressive product, but the Moxie is far and away the most discreet ‘secret fun’ toy you can have while out and about. Utilising We-Vibe’s app (but also coming with a handy-dandy remote), the Moxie uses magnets to keep itself fastened to the inside of your partner’s undergarments. It’s quaint, simple to use, has pretty solid battery life, and is one of those things you can forget about until the best moment. To keep your partner thinking about you while you (or they) are out and about, the Moxie is your toy.
We-Vibe Jive
We-Vibe was always going to be the vibe for this section. With their extensive array of toys for every situation, what’s not to love! When it comes to sharing pleasure, their family of toys that maintain a similar shape through different iterations (Match, Sync, and most recently the Chorus) is usually a big seller. And while these toys are great, they are all shaped to accommodate a penis in the mix as well, and while they’re all fantastic in their own right (the Chorus in particular!), in our scenario for this blog post, we, unfortunately, lack said penis in said mix. However, keep an eye out for an upcoming blog entry on the various toys in that range. Regardless, this paragraph is about the We-Vibe Jive. The Jive, similar to the Moxie can be controlled by the wonderful We-Vibe app, and the shape, along with the comfortable high-grade silicone, means it can be worn out and about. The Jive is, however, dissimilar to the Moxie in that the Jive is inserted into the vagina, as opposed to worn on your partner’s undergarments. It’s comfortably shaped, easy to use, and just as secretly sexy as the Moxie, but a little more fulfilling, if you catch my drift.
For Penis-Havers:
We-Vibe Vector
When I say We-Vibe will be the ideal toy for you and your partner to share, I meant it. The ditto is your stock-standard vibrating prostate massager, but just better in every way, as it not only vibrates against your prostate, it also vibrates against your perineum, or more crassly, your gooch. In doing so, it stimulates your senses in ways 5-Gum could only dream of. The Vector, just as all We-Vibe products, is rechargeable, and similarly, this one connects seamlessly with the app. With a spanning array of inbuilt vibration modes, but also the ability to manipulate the vibration with We-Connect
, it’s perfect for that cheeky time out and about where it would be just terrible if you or your partner were just a little distracted. Again, what’s not to love.
We-Vibe Verge
If you were thinking “surely he can’t choose a We-Vibe product again“, you were dead wrong. The Verge is just waiting to be your best friend in the bedroom and on the go. Made to be worn during sex, the Verge is a vibrating cock ring and perineum massager that doesn’t take up a lot of real estate where it counts. With the powerful motor’s ability to be positioned over the perineum or in line with where the clitoris would be during sex, the possibilities of pleasure are endless. Differing from the Verge’s cock-ring-cousin, the Pivot, the Verge is placed over the testes and shaft, as opposed to the Pivots shaft-only construction. This allows for a snug fit regardless of the hardness of you or your partner (however, while using the product, I can’t imagine things would be too soft for too long). It’s discreet, quiet, and easily hidden once it’s on, and along with the Vector, it could realistically be used in conjunction with some of the other toys mentioned on this list. It’s fun, cheeky, and ready to go when you are.
For Both of You (at the same time!):
KIIROO Couples Set (Onyx 2 & Pearl 2)
Now, I know this is a little wacky. Who would have thought something so technologically and sexualogically superior existed! For this, I step away from the ever-present We-Vibe (shocker, right?) and welcome something so impressive it sits in a locked glass cabinet in the adult store where I work; The KIIROO Couple Set, combining KIIROO’s Onyx 2 and Pearl 2 products. The weirdly pokemon themed toys are incredible in their own right. For the Pearl, it’s an impressively powerful vibrator that touts its versatility in compatibility with not only the Onyx (the penis equivalent toy), but any other KIIROO toys (allowing for any partner to interact with you, regardless of body parts), along with various applications, certain videos on your favourite porn sites, and certain VR environments that involve getting down and dirty. The pearl has 5 preset solo vibration modes, but the main attraction is the Bluetooth mode, allowing for some incredible long distance loving. Paired with the Onyx, the Pearl transmits the sensations the toy is experiencing (insertion-wise) and transmits them to the paired toy, allowing for some realistic and real-time long-distance relations. With an intuitive pairing process, and the ability to also use the toys solo, the KIIROO couples set is something that should definitely be on the shopping list.
Part Three: Why Wait?
Now, more than ever, there is less stigma around the usage of sex toys. Similarly, the technology and functionality of sex toys is at an all-time high, with brand new, exciting, sexy things just beyond the horizon. The toys mentioned in this post are incredible feats of technology, giving us the ability to interact with and enjoy our most personal and private moments while continents away. As the title says, long-distance doesn’t need to be the end of your sex life. In fact, it can be the door to a new beginning, opening a new dimension of intricacy to your love-making. Get down to business. Treat you and your partner to a present you’ll both love, and enjoy those late-night phone calls to your partner just a little bit more.
What’s not to love?
Alex is a consultant at the Oh Zone Adult Stores Sydney
How I kept sex with my girlfriend alive… while I was half way around the world
So I kind of decided to move halfway around the world to New York to pursue my career in Media for a year. It was one of my dreams to always live and work in New York City so there was no way I was turning it down. There was one issue. Bianca and I have been together for 3 years, she is definitely the love of my life and can confirm she is the so called “One”. The dilemma was that Bianca owns her own business which she needs to physically be there for. It’s not the pick up and go type and you can run it sitting on a beach in the Bahamas. For as long as we have been dating, she always new my dream was in New York. She knew that it would mean the world to me and if I was to ever get that opportunity, I would take it in a heartbeat. We sat down and had a discussion. To my surprise, she was so cool and calm about it. She said that, she will fly over and have a snowy Christmas in New York and spend New Years with me and also she’ll come across for the 4th July independence day for 2 weeks. The discussion of sex and needs came up. It came through a joke that she made, saying “You better not think about getting yourself a little ghetto queen over there”, I couldn’t stop laughing because little did she know that I decided that if we make it through this year apart, I’m getting on one knee in the middle of Time Square on New Years when she is over here.
Bianca was always the spontaneous type and a sexual deviant. Two weeks before I was meant to fly out, she sent me a text saying to meet her for lunch. She pretty much said it’s a new cafe in Caringbah. She sent me the address and I met her at the front, except it wasn’t a cafe… It was an adult shop. I said to her “This place looks like they do a mean steak” she replied, “If you’re leaving me for 1 year, there is no way I’m going to cope with just you telling me how much you want to fuck me over skype”. We went in and the girl there was so bubbly “Hey guys, how’s your day going”, automatically I thought wow this is different. She told us if we need any help, just to give her a yell. Bianca and I walked around the store, giggled and had a laugh. I was going to miss spending time with her and then my dick seem to simultaneously agree. Bianca walked over and asked the lady for some help. “So… his leaving me for a year to gallivant around New York. We want to get some things that will keep our sex life alive”. Well lets just say who knew sex toys have come this far.
She said that there are a few things that we can get and continued to show us our options. “Let’s start with you” as she looked at me. “Men are way easier to please then woman” she continued. Bianca shot out a quick and quirky “Agreed”. She showed us the Fleshlight range which I heard about. She continued to tell us that she would recommend going with the Fleshlight Crystal Ice which was the clear one, reason being is that when we do have Facetime sex, Bianca can see my penis going through making it extremely stimulating for the both of us. She said that when we are together, we can also use it. So that was pretty much me sorted. She added that I should get a thicker lube that is warming to make it more realistic, I ended up getting the Wicked Toy Fever Heating.
Now was Bianca’s turn. Bianca had in her mind that she wanted to get two toys for some reason. I was the one leaving her so I just said “Baby you get whatever you want”. She ended up finding a really strong G-Spot vibrator, it was by Evolved. She liked the fact that she could use it internally and on her clitoris when we have sex together. The lady showed us the We-Vibe Sync, which is designed to be used anywhere in the world. It was pretty much perfect for us because while I was on facetime on my Ipad with Bianca, I can control her vibe from New York to make it feel like we are more together. She said that I can get the matching Cockring one and just put it on my testies and Bianca can control so I don’t miss out either. We ended up getting everything that the lady recommend.
– – – 9 Months Later – – –
So 9 months has gone passed and I thought I’d check in. What a difference those toys have made to our sex life as a whole but to the fact that we now have the kinkiest and funnest time using them on Facetime together. Bianca came over for her two week visit in July and it was so good to be able to properly use them together. We love the We-Vibe the most. I won’t lie, I cum a little quicker when she wears it because it vibrates on my penis but hey it’s the fun of it. I made her wear it when we went to Wal Mart, lets just say she was dropping everything because I kept turning it on and off randomly.
I highly recommend to any couple that is doing a long distance relationship to really look into getting masturbators and any toy that is app compatible. It will ease so much sexual tension and add so much more fun and excitement to your relationship that transcends beyond the oceans.